The Wrong Message

When I was just starting Bible college, I went to the "Teen Studies" that the youth ministry in Baltimore has every Saturday night. I didn't really do much, I was stuck between a teenager and a team member, but I remember a Pastor coming up to me and telling me that I had a gift in working with young people. I kind of just shrugged this off as nothing and didn't think any more about it.

When I moved to Hungary, I was encouraged to help out with the Friday night Bible studies, help run events at school, and also "run with the boys" on the soccer team. I did it (and still do) and it's fun. I don't really think about it.

About two months ago, I had the opportunity to go on a class trip with the 9th and 10th graders from school. It was AWESOME. I had so much fun with them. I think over the course of two days I got about five hours of sleep but I felt like the Energizer Bunny. I kept going and going and going. I didn't really think about this until one of the other chaperones asked me how I was able to keep up. I didn't know what to say. This kind of stuff is just fun for me.

I don't think I'm special. I know kids like me, but I don't really think anything of it. I know there are much better youth leaders around the world and I think that to even call myself a youth leader is kind of overstating what I do. It doesn't take anything out of me, it doesn't take any work or preparation. I just like being with younger people and getting to know them.

This past weekend we had a youth retreat with the Korean church that I attend on Sundays. Admittedly, I don't know the kids as well as I would like. This has been different than school. In school you get to know students day in and day out for the majority of the year. In church, you see them for like two hours on Sundays and then go about your week. As the week of the retreat approached I felt a bit apprehensive. Do they really care if I'm there? Do I add anything? I'm an American guy in the middle of 26 Korean kids and a handful of Korean adults. How can I relate to these kids? We're not from the same culture or generation. Most of them grew up across the globe and I'm American through and through. Do they think I'm just some weirdo who is trying to be Korean? (I'm not, by the way. I just think that Korean culture is more similar to American culture than either Chinese or Hungarian, the two other main nationalities I have taught, and so I get along best with Koreans.) Do I have anything to actually give them?

These are the things I was thinking about all week before the retreat. Stupid. As soon as I got on the bus with the kids I was overflowing with joy. I was excited. I had energy. We barn danced, we ate good food, we played frisbee in the dark, and when the frisbee broke, we played tag. I got a solid five hours of sleep after a long work week and then hit the ground running Saturday morning, by the afternoon, however, I was dragging. What happened? I was worn out. This hasn't happened to me before.

But then...

A girl I had met just once before the retreat, a girl who isn't part of a church, but was invited by her friend, asked me a question... about God's love. She heard a message that she didn't understand but it led to an opportunity for God to reveal Himself to her. I foolishly thought it was the wrong message, but God used it.

Bam.

Wide awake.
We talked for the next hour.
She prayed to accept Christ as her Savior.

I was awake. The rest of the night was incredible. This new energy burst from me. I was lip syncing and dancing on the bus ride home. I was so happy and excited, it's Wednesday and I'm still thinking about it!

In II Timothy 1:6 Paul writes "I remind you to stir up the gift of God which is in you." I understand now. This is my calling. I am stirred up in my gift as my gift is stirred up. In pouring out, I am being poured into. How am I able to keep going?
God.
God is working through me. I find the greatest, most lasting memories in my life are when I speak one on one with young people. The other stuff, the dancing, singing, cookies that I bake, are all just ways to get into those conversations. They are tools God has given me to reach people. When I am able to connect with kids like I did during this retreat, that's when I feel the closest to Him. It quickens me. I'm not anything but God uses what I am. I thought I was just a sub, a fill in, but I was wrong.

Here they are:

These kids are incredible. They wanted to pray longer than our prayer sessions lasted. They were (mostly) able to stay awake through four pretty substantial and challenging messages. I love them so much.